When it comes to hair, men and women are passionate about the subject, but mostly women. I saw a movie on Netflix the other day, « Nappily Ever after », here is the trailer. It’s about the dictatorship around perfect hair in the Black Community. Eventhough it’s very oriented, I think everybody can relate, because we are so exposed to the beauty standards according to the advertisement, the social media, and so on.
Everybody has not been granted with easygoing hair, and we can’t all « wash and go » as it is sometimes put. It is a reality for most of us, but it becomes more complicated by the way we think about our hair, the actions we take regarding the hair which make it even more difficult to « tame ». Are you still Following me ? Let me explain. I have frizzy hair, and I Don’t know how to take care of it, so I use a relaxer, or straighten it, by doing so, my hair becomes fragile, stops growing. Since I Don’t like having frizzy roots, I put more relaxer, and some more products in order to protect and repair the damages caused by relaxing and / or the heat, which make my hair breakable, etc. the vicious circle is on, ad vitam aeternam.
Same thing with curly hair, I want it straight, because that’s the trend and plus, it makes me look like a good girl. So I use heat, for blow drying or flat ironing, which burns my hair (despite all the protective products), it makes it breakable, fragile, it stops growing. I need to put more protective products in order to repair the damages, my curls are less defined, I Don’t like them, I need to straighten the hair over and over again, ad vitam aeternam. Please, no frizz ! Is it raining ? OMG ! Sorry ladies and gentlement, I’m teasing but it’s true. No hard feelings 😉
OK. How to escape ?
I will never say it enough, love what you have when you Don’t have what you love. I repeat, love what you … Just kidding. You get my point. The problem starts with how we interact with our head hair. I talk about other body hair here. Living a simple life begins by keeping it as it is, life is often simple from the start until we mess with it. Going back to the hair, each of us has a certain amount of hair, with a specific texture. Your hair can be dry, or oily, it grows fast or slowly, it depends. Our hair needs to be hydrated, our scalp needs to be washed from time to tome to remove the extra sebum, and that’s about it. Oh, yeah, a little bit of trimming doesn’t hurt, it helps boosting the growth. Even a big chop can be of great good, it strengthens the hair and you feel lighter and free.
Step 1, I study my hair and choose to love it the way it is.
It starts by giving the minimum care to our hair so that it’s clean. Some wash their hair once or twice a Week, other less than that, you decide what’s best for you, but too much washing is not very good, for your scalp is then forced to produce an extra amount of sebum in order to protect itself, which gives you the impression that you hair is dirty. Doing those basics allows you to observe your hair and see how it really is, that way you will understand what it needs and how to take good care of it. Once you know your hair better, you choose to love it. I said you choose, you might not have had the choice when you were an embryo, now you have it. Prayer to the moms and dads of children with curly, frizzy hair, please leave them alone, teach your sons and daughters how to love and respect their hair and how to take care of it naturally. A child who was told that its hair is difficult to maintain, will have a hard time loving its hair and knowing how to look after it. You would do them a big favor, thanks in advance for them.
Step 2, hydrate, hydrate, hydrate again.
All the types of hair need hydration : even oily hair are thirsty, so, let’s hydrate. Water firts, Inside and outside. Drinking water maintains the whole body hydrated and it’s good for our hair. Between two shampoos, in order to make the styling easier, a bit of water with or without a few drops of natural coco, olive, almond or any other vegetable oil.
Finish your shampoo by applying 100% natural oil in order to maintain the hydration of the hair and give a shiny touch to your looks.
Step 3, Don’t touch your hair too much.
Parents of children with curly or frizzy hair are often lost when it comes to detangling this type of hair. Grown-ups know that problem too. Detangling your hair when it’s still dry is the best way to break it, let alone the pain. Detangle when you shampoo or with a conditionner.
Routine for shampooing and detangling gently.
- Start by pouring warm water on you hair, Apply a small amount of shampoo, it’s better to dilute so that you Don’t use it pure.
- Rub your scalp in circular movements in order to stimulate the blood circulation.
- Detangle you hair using a large comb which is more adapted to curly or frizzy hair, you have less breakage and the curls are not to straightened.
- Rince and dry with a towel.
- Apply a few drops of oïl and let air dry after styling your hair how you like it with you fingers. Don’t comb or brush after the shampoo.
About volume and styling. Curly and frizzy hair gain volume as they dry. They shrink on the top of the head. If you like it, that’s good, you can even intensify it by hair blowing your hair upside down, big hair on the way.
I have a good news for those who want to control the volume and the frizz. It’s possible without heat, Hairspray or other sticky gels.
For that, you need to have enough length to make twist or small braids. After washing you hair as explained above, Apply some oil from the roots to the tips and braid you hair or twist it. The oil is trully what keeps you hair’s hydration. I usually wash my hair early in the evening so that my hair has time to dry for the next Morning. But the more you keep the braids, the better the result will be, for you hair will have a natural set.
By doing braids, or plaits if you know how to, your hair takes the shape of the braids, the more you make them tight, the more you’ll have curls. If they are more loose, your result will be more wavy, which is also pretty. The volume you get depends on how many braids you make, the fewer braids, the lesser volume. The plaits that I make are inverted, the locks of hair are twisted which allows the curls to be formed. But the twists and the regular braids are good too. Do some research about the braid out, you’ll find plenty of information. For you girls with frizzy hair, there are tons of websites out there on the Internet, go check for yourselves. This one is in French if you are curious.
Here is the result when I take the braids out. Take note that I Don’t personally try to have very well defined curls, I just want to have a nice hairstyle, with little volume (I can have a lot of it) if I want to.
You are hairless ? No problem ! It’s better to proudly hold you bald head up than trying to hide what is obvious for everybody.
You thought you had lost me, right ? Smile, at least you have hair, you can be proud of it, you just need to be patient and learn how to love it by finding the best way to make your hair fit into you life. Remember, the less you tease your hair, the more it will be easy to style, and it starts at an early age. Let’s teach our children how to be proud of who they are and what they have, to love what they have when they Don’t have what they love.
I leave you with another series of pictures with and without volume. It’s the same length of hair !!!
Let’s take care of ourselves.
See you around !